Protective Behaviours, What's that?

Protective Behaviours (PBs) is a practical and down to earth approach to personal safety. It is a process which can also be used as a programme if needed. The name 'Protective Behaviours' is somewhat misleading but, with its origins in child abuse prevention, it is understandable why the process received this name. Over the years, as applications of PBs have broadened, the name seems to have remained with us. This paper looks at what Protective Behaviours is and some of its uses. It is intended as an information paper with the hope that the reader will see its relevance to their specific interests and will then attend training.

A typical introductory training day consists of exploring the following ideas, which are presented here as separate sections. In practice, all interact and support each other. To take one section out leaves the others incomplete.

Unwritten Rules of Society We see how certain rules of society have a powerful influence on our choices of behaviour. Whilst these rules can be positive and help to guide our interactions, many of them tell us we should, ought, or must behave in a particular way. For instance, children should do as adults tell them; professionals should always have the answer; men should not show their feelings and women should behave in a ladylike manner. These rules are not written down, are often contradictory and do not seem to fit in with our own experience. During training we look at their function, how they develop, their effects and how to change them if necessary.

Feelings, Thought and Behaviour During this session we look at the interaction between our feelings, thoughts and behaviour. We see that feelings are feelings, neither right nor wrong, good nor bad. Some people seem to mask one feeling with another or use behaviour as a way of avoiding or covering feelings. We look at how behaviour is a choice with an effect, usually involving others as well as ourselves. Sometimes we do not know what our choices are or they may be limited by factors we cannot change. Once we are in touch with our feelings it helps free us to use our thinking. Our thinking can influence both our feelings and behaviour.

Theme 1. 'We all have the right to feel safe all the time'

We explore this theme in detail, carefully looking at the connection between rights and responsibilities. We also take the concepts of blame and punishment out of commonly held ideas associated with responsibilities. Instead we focus on the 'ability to respond' contained within the meaning of the word. The difference between having a responsibility for ourselves and to others is also examined. Next we discover for ourselves the difference between feeling safe, fun to feel scared (adventurousness), risking on purpose (which may not feel like fun but we still have choice) and feeling unsafe. These differences are manifested by what we call our 'Early Warning Signs' (EWS), specific bodily responses which tell us when we do not feel safe. It is these universal body signs which mean that Protective Behaviours is accessible to all people, irrespective of age, gender, nationality, ability or belief system.

Theme 2. 'There is nothing so awful we can't talk about it with someone'

This theme is also explored in detail. In particular we focus on the ideas and effects of 'talking', and what might happen if we do not believe in this theme. We encourage everyone to develop their personal networks of support. Those people they could turn to if in need. Desired qualities of network people are identified and we examine how we would know if someone has these qualities. Types of networks and ways of letting people know we need to talk with them are also explored.


The Seven Strategies

During training we examine how these strategies can be used to effectively implement the core ideas. The strategies include:

Theme Re-inforcement - re-inforcing the two themes verbally, visually and especially by example.

Network Review - constantly checking to ensure that out networks are available and still fit our needs.

One Step Removed - using a 'third person' approach to problem solving, to seek assistance or to check out someone's ideas before making a disclosure. This might include role play, videos or asking for help for another person.

Protective Interrupting - any action we take to interrupt or halt any potential or actual unsafe situation, for instance saying 'no' when someone is trying to make us do something we feel is wrong.

Persistence - persisting in seeking help until we feel safe again and our EWS have gone. This includes seeking further help if our EWS return.

Risking On Purpose(ROP) - deliberately choosing to take a risk when the outcome may be what we want or need, for example, going for a job interview. It also includes remembering our responsibilities towards other's safety. ROP "feeling the fear and doing it anyway". Saying ‘no’ may also involve ROP.

The Language Of Safety - This is the glue that holds all the Protective Behaviours elements together. It includes re-framing our language into an empowering, non-victimising and non-violent format that is consistent with the PB's process. It also means that we acknowledge that language is a powerful tool in forming and maintaining a positive self-image. We demonstrate the difference between 'political correctness', when we do not need to believe in what we are saying and PB's language where we know, for example that racist words are never acceptable because someone is likely to feel unsafe if we use such language. This would mean that we are not observing our responsibility to other people's right to feel safe.